The Year of Living Fearlessly

I’ve always felt that to be a writer requires a certain amount of fearlessness. Most writers have it, even if they don’t always own up to it. I guess there’s something poetic about the ongoing struggles with writer’s block, how to make money and “Oh, what will my family think if I write this?” But despite all the fretting over these things, most writers still write. That’s where the fearlessness comes in.

Because I have that “certain amount” of fearlessness, I believe it has rendered me blind to the fear that does show up for me. I can give you a short, but highly relevant list of things I held back from getting or pursuing or doing for a variety of reasons: I don’t have the money, time, ability, reason, support, energy, ideas, skills, strength, you name it… to do X, Y, or Z. I’ve allowed myself to be talked out of things: “Oh, you don’t really need to do that. Why would you put yourself through that? Why don’t you just do this, it’s easier.” The reasons are all plausible and even true in their own ways. However at the heart of each reason, and I am scared to even say this out loud, is fear. There’s this little girl voice in the back of my head and many, many times a day she is saying, “Oooh! You’re gonna get in trouble!”

And I believe her. And I stop short. Because that’s what a good girl does. A good girl doesn’t step outside herself. A good girl doesn’t get “too big for her britches”. A good girl does things the way they’ve always been done.

I’m tired of it. I don’t want another year to come and go and for me to still be tired of it and to still have things I want to do left undone. So this year, I’m stepping out onto the high wire. There may be a net down there or there may not be. I don’t know, I’m too high up to see.

This year, 2010, will be for me the Year of Living Fearlessly. I’m going to explore every dark corner of my soul and shine the light in there and ask, “What do I REALLY want?” A lot of this, I know, will challenge me on what I really want to write, how I want to be with my family, how I want my business to be run.

You can be a part of the conversation as well because I’m planning live forums, both virtually and in person, where we can each search out our fearlessness in our own ways. But I’m hoping to demonstrate this new fearlessness not just by talking, but by what I actually do this year: the work I complete, the milestones I achieve, the creativity expressed.

I must tell you honestly, I have no idea how this will end up. I just know it’s a new day in a new year and I wouldn’t be able to stand it if I kept doing things exactly the way I’ve been doing them. Living fearlessly, for me, means stepping up to be the writer I want to be and riding the creative arc to wherever it may take me.

What does living fearlessly mean to you?

Let’s start the conversation right here. And let’s keep talking–and doing–for the next 12 months.